Wednesday, November 3, 2010

just some thoughts

my oh my, how absent i've been. my apologies, little blog. i ran away for a while, but i've returned. really, i just took a little leave of absence. i wasn't actually off on a run-away adventure, as you probably know, but was just living in a cloud called grad school. and sure, i could blog through all of that, but in short, i wasn't feeling very inspired recently.

and inspiration, for me, is what this little place is for. this blog has been in the back of my mind during the last few weeks that i've been quiet though. i've been thinking of its purpose, what i want it to be. you see, when i first started it, this was just my place to write about things i found inspiring. i was scared of it being personal, scared that a personal blog about my life meant i was self-absorbed or self-obsessed. but slowly i found a lot of happiness in recording memories here, and the positive sides of sharing personal thoughts. and i realized that it could be both, about inspiration and my life, and that was more about connecting with this big beautiful world, than about focusing on myself.

also, i've been thinking a lot recently about how little i know about my mother. I was so young when we lost her, and i have so few memories of her tucked away in my collection that it sometimes makes my boots so heavy. i wish so much that i had a journal hers where i could read about her memories, her jokes, her thoughts, her struggles, her inspirations, because then i think i would feel so much more of a connection to her. that way i could know her. anyhow, i have no idea what my future holds, whether i'll have kids, or grow to be an old lady, but i want to save some piece of my life like that, so even if i'm the only person to ever read it, i can look back and know myself better.

so theres that. thanks for reading, if you do.
all my love,

1 comment: